I flip on the light. “Time to get up guys” I say in my soft loving voice. I then set their clothes next to them on their bed and head down stairs to start my morning. I shut off the house alarm, dodge random toys that litter the floor and head to the back door where my two crazy pooches are at eager to get outside. Five minutes later and still no boys, I holler (yes I said holler) up the stairs “Come on boys!” Then five more minutes go by, “BOYS GET OUT OF BED! BREAKFAST IS READY!” I am now screaming like a wild woman. Then a few minutes later they finally “grace” me with their presence. Is this what your morning’s sound like? Well I figured out a trick, not only to get your kiddos out of bed but have fun and praise the Lord at the same time. I am still old school and use a boom-box for my music needs you can use an Ipod or whatever you have that can play music. I turn on my favorite Christian radio station and jump into their room like a ROCK STAR! I begin singing at the top of my lungs and jumping around like a crazy lady sometime even playing my trusty air guitar. The look on their face the first morning is priceless if you have an accomplice make sure they are armed with a camera. Now my mornings are more like a worship service than like a screaming match. When they are eating breakfast and I am in the kitchen fixing lunches I have the same radio station on rockin’ out. I am known to bust a move right there in my kitchen. Starting my mornings off praising the Lord helps to keep me in His light all day!
Shhhh Don’t Tell….
Posted by ArissaApr 25
I am going to admit something to you that I haven’t told anyone. Okay I did tell my sister but that is it, other than her you are the only other person I have told. My two oldest sons have never been to the dentist. UGH! Okay I am a bad Mom! Who likes the dentist? It’s not fun and really I just want to hide my head in the sand and act like brushing is enough. It isn’t like they complain of pain or sensitivity, we eat healthy and brush! I woke up last week and realized that at some point I am going to have to take them so I called the insurance company hoping to find a pediatric dentist in our town. You know the cool ones that have the underwater theme, all the great art work on the ceiling and goofy assistants that make the kids feel at ease. Yeah well that didn’t happen, they couldn’t find any pediatric dentist in the entire surrounding area. Now for those of you that don’t know I live just outside the Nation’s capital, how on Earth can their not be a pediatric dentist in my area that takes my insurance. I honestly thought my insurance company had lost its mind so I tried calling a few of the dentists that have cool commercials. Sure enough they don’t take my insurance but the sure want to schedule an appointment and I can make payments. Sorry folks I am not crazy or rich! LOL! Eventually I found this dentist that was willing to see my boys so I set an appointment for Monday and decided that I would just keep my oldest home from school. After arriving at the house, I mean office we were greeted by three ladies that were jammed into a small office like sardines in a can. It was so hard for me not to laugh out loud at the site of them asking each other to pass things. As soon as I was done filling out the first visit paperwork, they called us back. I was not very impressed with the facility or the technician that was assisting us. I explained that this was their first visit and that they didn’t know what to expect. The lady just looked at me like I had spoken to her in Greek. She dawned her gloves and started in on telling my eldest what was about to happen and how she was going to clean his teeth. All the while I am thinking, I am never coming back here! He surprisingly sat very still and allowed her to do the cleaning and even was very good when the dentist came in and checked his teeth. Sadly he had one small cavity and I was told that his six year molars are in and that he needed them sealed. I said okay and we swapped out the boys. Now with the middle guy in the seat I braced myself for the inevitable, and the screaming began!!!! I stopped the crazy technician and had my guy look at me I said “If you want me to stay with you, you are going to have to stop screaming. They will make me leave if you keep screaming and crying.” With that he stopped and allowed the technician and dentist to do their thing. Afterwards the dentist informed us that he has four small cavities. He looked at me and said, “They have too much sugar and soda!” I was now fuming! Why must dentists assume that you feed your children junk! I stared straight back at him and said, “They don’t get soda or even juice, candy they get on special occasions!” At that he said to make a follow up appointment to get the cavities filled and sealer put on the molars, and not to worry there is no shots involved. That was the best news I heard all day! I went to the front desk as the boys got toys out of the treasure box. They told me that they had an opening on Wednesday afternoon and so I hesitated but took the appointment. Fast forward to today! On the way to the dentist the boys question me about my wedding or lack thereof. (We eloped secretly) The best part was when they asked, “Did you kiss?” and then hysterical laughter ensued. LOL, my boys constantly make me smile. After we arrive they whisk us in the back put both boys in separate chairs and got to work. This time the dentist and an assistant work on the middle guy and a tech and an assistant work on my big guy. Well, apparently the prayers and pep talk in the car didn’t work and the big guy bursts into tears and it takes 15 minutes to calm him down. All the while the middle guy is still and quiet. Who would have thought? After the appointment, I realized that first impressions aren’t always good and that you really need to give people and businesses second chances. When I arrived home I was looking over my receipt and realized that they didn’t charge me for all four of the middle guys fillings so I called the office and explained that I thought they had under charged me. The receptionist put me on hold and after a few minutes she came back on the line and said I checked with the doctor and he said the receipt is right and that he had filled all four of the cavities. Yippee! It cost me $90 less than I was quoted! God is good all the time!
86 Days left…MAYBE??
Posted by TimAynApr 24
Several old military sayings I heard from our time in service come to mind right now… “Hurry up and wait!” and “If the military wanted you to have a wife, they would have issued you one!” I say this because my DH called today and said his return date may be changing. Inside I was screaming, but I tried to stay calm to hear the rest of the story. The company is short handed the entire month of July so his return could be delayed until mid-August. He was also quick to tell that mid-August was better than what the schedule currently read – December!!!!! All of a sudden August didn’t sound too bad. We had a lovely talk that lasted over an hour, a luxury that is few and far between because of lousy internet connections. As I cleaning up after dinner, or should I say “feeding time at the zoo,” I thought about how tired I was. Not physically tired, but the kind of exhaustion only a single-mom or military spouse will ever be able to fully understand. It’s a bone-tired, reserves are depleted kind of fatigue. Nothing but reuniting with your spouse can fix it 
BUT, just as single mom’s and military spouses around the world do, I accepted my current situation and began to think about ways I could make life a little easier. I laughed out loud as I thought about the events of the day; EVERYONE, except me, woke up on the wrong side of the monday morning bed and was subsequently cranky and irresponsible about school assignments. At recess time we lined up at the back gate to head out to the park and I realized my 8 yr old son had no shoes on AGAIN. Not wanting to allow this to become a habit I headed in to help him find them, bc if he went in alone we’d be waiting for hours! Just as soon as we found them I heard a scuffle outside, I looked out the window just in time to see my 9 yr old daughter “sword fighting” with my 3 yr old son. BAM! She accidentally hit him in the mouth, several bloody rags later and some hugs and we were ready to go again. Once out the gate the 9 yr old had a total meltdown that the entire world was unfair to her, then moments later my 7 yr old son ran through a fire ant hill, ALL the way across the park from me, in bare feet! I ran across the park (which mind you was sopping wet from the sprinkler system that had just finished) to him and quickly swept them off his legs. Phew, disaster averted…at least that’s what I thought until I heard my 5yr old daughter yell for me. I turned around and saw her standing in the middle of the sopping wet grass I had just ran through, she had slipped and fallen and her whole back side from the top of her head to her shoes was soaked! At that point I really wanted a do over, let’s just all go home and go back to bed and try it again! LOL. Anyway fast forward through the rest of the day and a few more unmentionable accidents and events to my current mindset of trying to make things run more smoothly until July or August or whenever DH gets to come home. I realized that I had plenty of discipline and consequences built in to my day, the kids know that Y happens if you do X. So this begs the question, “Why aren’t they doing the right thing consistently?” I understand normal child development and I also understand that a certain amount of that is normal with my children’s ages. This knowledge and experience also tells me that somethings out of balance. I love how God drops little nuggets of wisdom right where we need them, well in my case He has to keep re-dropping them because I keep forgetting! If your encouragement vs. discipline percentage isn’t in balance the result is what’s occurring in my house right now as we speak! I once had a college professor of child development tell us that you need at least 80% positive interactions in a day to allow the 20% of discipline to succeed. I certainly had not encouraged my children 80% of the time today or any other day in near past. It’s a slippery slide that we walk on as Mom’s. We all inherently know this balance between encouragement and discipline exists and we naturally try to create it, but over time we slip away. We don’t usually slip towards more encouragement either! I firmly believe the more kids you have the quicker and further you slip down this slope before you realize it. Now away with the thoughts of failure and negativity all you lovely Mom’s out there, because if you’re feeling convicted at this moment AND you’re exhausted thinking about the climb back up the slope there is hope! The conviction and exhaustion mean you HAVEN’T GIVEN UP!! The solution is simple, not easy, but simple. You don’t have to reinvent the wheel you just have to try to encourage as much as possible for the next week or so. You don’t stop all your discipline, but choose your battles very wisely. Children respond to their environments very quickly and your household will not be any different. Stay focused on your goal and pray that God will show you all the places you can encourage your children.
~ Encouragement vs. Praise ~
Posted by TimAynApr 23
I would love to take credit for the wisdom that is about to come, but alas I did not come up with this idea! LOL. On first glance encouragement and praise seem like they can be used interchangeably, in fact dictionary.com uses the word praise in it’s definition of encouragement. However, I challenge you to dig deeper with me. When it comes to teaching your children to continue a behavior because it means something to them rather than because someone else wants them to, the difference becomes crystal clear. In my mind I equate praise with flattery. Most of the time flattery is empty, in fact Proverbs 26:28 says, “A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin.” The writer of Proverbs, inspired by God, speaks of flattery in the same sentence as lying. That’s because flattery simply tells someone else what you think of the action they did, it doesn’t inspire them to see how they feel about the action they did. It’s the difference between making your children dependent on what you think or teaching them to evaluate their actions for themselves. I first heard this topic discussed in one of my early childhood development classes in college, but like a lot of other bits of wisdom, I shelved them for later use and forgot about them. God brought this to my remembrance today as I sought His help on dealing with what feels like a landslide of parenting issues! I came across the following article while refreshing my mind about the difference between Encouragement and Praise. I have only read the the article and comments following on this topic, I have NOT researched this child psychologist any further or read any of her other ideas on parenting. She does not appear to have used any Christian influence or background in her personal summary of Encouragement vs. Praise, but she does sight some other books. My Bachelors degree in Psychology with a minor in Early Childhood Development gave me the background to know the conclusion that Encouragement being better for children than praise was accurate. On a personal note I would encourage you to be careful, actually be diligent to compare the parenting advice and ideas you find online to the Bible. Even if the author claims to be a Christian authority on parenting practices and principles, you as Mom are the ultimate authority and the only one that will answer to God for your discipline techniques. God’s word says He is faithful to give us what we ask for, I know that He has always provided me with the answer to my parenting question when I took the time to ask Him. Unfortunately, too often I sought “googles” thoughts first! God entrusted your children to you for a reason. No behavior they display shocks God. He’s waiting to be your “go to guy” on anything parenting wise. He may lead you to a book or an idea that’s already been discussed by another Christian, but we would be wise Mom’s if we asked for His guidance first. With no further distractions here is the link:
http://www.thekidcounselor.com/articles/encouragement-vs-praise
* Prayer Time *
Posted by TimAynApr 20
Why is it that some of the most important moments we will ever spend with our children, happen at the most exhausting part of our day? I don’t know what bed time looks like at your house, but let me just tell you it’s not always pretty at mine! Don’t get me wrong, I have a bedtime routine which should look something like this: All five beautiful angels pajama themselves and do an exceptional job flossing and brushing their own teeth (without being asked.) They each settle down with an educational book allowing me to put my three yr. old to bed without interruption, AND he of course doesn’t fuss because he loves to lay down in his bed. I read and pray with him and then repeat the process with each child in age order. Always having uninterrupted time to pray and answer all questions that are asked. They sweetly pray with me, understand their devotional and drift off to sleep quickly without getting out of bed. I peacefully retire to my own bed to enjoy some much needed reading and praying time…NOT!!! Oh how I wish this happened every night, ok who am I kidding, maybe just once a week???? All joking aside, for most Mom’s this is the hardest part of the day to follow through with. We are exhausted and pulling our hair out by then, and want nothing more than a huge chocolate bar and some peace and quiet. However, as exhausted as we are, it’s imperative to our children’s spiritual development that we persevere. Those final precious moments that we spend with our children every day leave a lasting impression. Our children vie for our attention all throughout the day whether they’re toddlers or teenagers. Sometimes tucking them in and kisses their sweet faces is the only time they had our undivided attention that day. Can you blame them for wanting it to last just a little bit longer? Mom, you are such a special treat, and your loving prayers and words mean the world to them. The Bible says we are to teach our children about God from the time they get up until the time they go to bed AND all the time in between. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want my children to fall asleep one more night without thoughts of Jesus filling their minds! Who better to put them there than you…So I ask, have you prayed with your children tonight?
Gaining My Focus!
Posted by ArissaApr 18
Lately I have been so focused on the negative I have been unable to see the positive. I woke up this morning determined to do the opposite. During my prayer time I asked God to show me the blessings in my life, WOW! Read the rest of this before you do that! First the dog threw up on my freshly shampooed carpet then when my friend was dropping off her baby she told me, “She has been cranky.” Which translates into hold on to your pants you are in for a rough ride today! God then played my favorite song on the radio, Beautiful by Need to Breathe! Both babies went down for a nap at the same time and I managed to read my weekly Psychology homework! I was on top of the world!!! Then my Sister-in-law will be staying at our house four days a week while she works in a neighboring town so she showed up to drop off her things before heading to her first day of work. Then my friend came by to see her baby on her lunch break, such a blessing to have some adult conversation in the middle of the day. I was eating my lunch, a salad, and telling the HILARIOUS story of how my 6 year old recently discovered jelly while at a friend’s house. I was doing what every good parent tells their child NOT to do, talk and eat at the same time. Looking back I am wondering why I was in such a hurry to eat, it’s not like a salad is going to get cold. Anyways, I started laughing and inhaled at the same time causing a piece of lettuce to get stuck in my throat. I then started to cough and was asked the normal, “Are you okay?” I replied through my coughing, “Yeah!” But I continued to cough, and in my embarrassment I ran to the bathroom. Then there I continued coughing, gagging and crying. I hear my friend yell through the door, “Are you okay?” I now cannot reply I can only exhale, cough, gag and cry. The door opens and my friend wraps her arms around me to do the Heimlich maneuver and I think to myself, “Oh man this is going to hurt!” I then realize I am getting tunnel vision and it sounds like I am in a cave, both which are signs that I am about to pass out. Suddenly out pops this innocent piece of lettuce and ahhhhhhhh I can breathe. I turn to look at my friend and all the blood has rushed out of her face and I catche a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I am pretty much purple, but I can BREATHE! There are two things I would like to point out. 1) I prayed to see the blessings in my life. 2) During the whole ordeal not once did I pray and ask God for help. Sometimes we are so focused on the negative we cannot see the positive. We are alive, we will have ever lasting life, we can walk, talk, stoop to pick up dog throw up and deal with cranky babies (P.S. she was not cranky today at all!) Even in the midst of the storm we need to seek God! God gave me such a great friend who knew how to do the Heimlich (though she never actually used it on me) and she knew when I didn’t answer her that I was desperately in trouble. The saying that comes to mind is: I am too blessed to be stressed! This is my new motto!
New Page Added: Homeschool HideOut
Posted by TimAynApr 17
This checklist will allow you to enter all your child’s school subjects and other daily responsibilities in the right hand column. The days of the school week, Monday – Friday, are listed across the top. So every day your student works their way down through their tasks, school or/and household, placing a mark in the empty box. You will need to adjust the Month and Days for your use. There are two full weeks on one page. Here are some more tips to use this checklist to it’s fullest potential:
- Print it on card stock for durability
- After you’ve printed your current two weeks, change your dates for the next two weeks. Flip your paper over and print. That will give you a whole month checklist on one page!
- I use a red pencil to place a star next to their mark after I’ve checked that subject’s completion.
- Buy cheap clipboards and have your child place their checklist on their own clipboard.
Click here to download: ->Schedule
121 Days…
Posted by TimAynApr 11
98 Days left: Today I would like to talk about motivation, which I find hilarious bc I haven’t been “motivated” to write in several days! Bwahahahah. I could go on and on about all the crazy things that happen when you’re trying to parent 5 kids alone, like an IPod being dropped in a toilet, like a glass jar of olive oil (extra virgin too $$) breaking on the floor in the middle of the all the other grocery bags, like my 8 yr old son hitting a metal pole with his tooth and knocking out half of it, like a cultural misunderstanding that lands us spending Easter with no family, like being so “busy” I don’t read my bible or pray, ICEE’s exploding on white shirts, drinks spilling at WalMart in the produce section, but I won’t bore you with all those silly, little details. Ok, OK, seriously I have to share my God moment tonight. I was driving to my “A Mom After God’s Own Heart” church group and sulking because of the crappy day I had experienced when the truth slammed me in the face – My house is a mess BECAUSE we have one, dishes are in my sink BECAUSE we have $ to buy food, my kids are driving me bonkers BECAUSE I have the privilege to homeschool this semester. What right do I have to sulk when I have everything I need and could want!! I don’t! And here I was driving by myself, kids home safe with a babysitter to talk “Mom talk” with another Sister in Christ! Seriously I was ashamed at that moment and adjusted my attitude. Consequently I had a great time with my friend and we encouraged each other quite a bit. As I was driving home I had one of those “God” moments, where it feels like God just places a whole thought process right in your brain. I hope you don’t think I’m crazy because that’s really how God speaks into my life. He created me and He knows best how to “speak” to me 
As I was thinking about how encouraged/motivated I felt after my visit I thought again about my recent struggles with motivation. These are not your everyday, “Oh I just feel lazy today” kind of things, I’m talking about a deep down, I don’t have any fight left in me, stick a fork in me I’m done kind of demotivation!! Nothing I have tried has helped. I might improve for a day, but never two in a row. The next day I feel beat down even worse than before. The gut-wrenching honesty about this is, there is no one else to take my place…even for a minute. There’s no one to lift my burden…even just one of them. So as the lack of motivation got worse and worse so did my downward death spiral (pardon the aviation pun, my awesome DH is an aviator.) So here’s what God then drops into my mind: What used to motivate you? Things like what would someone else think? What if someone else was watching? I don’t want people to pass quick judgements on me! I want people to think I’m a good Mom, housekeeper, teacher…. Then God reminds me of a prayer I said a LONG time ago, “God help me to not be motivated by what others will think because it makes me wishy washy! I want to have a firm grasp on who I am and what I’m doing.” Then He brings the thought process full circle by saying, “I’ve removed ALL extrinsic motivations!!” Dictionary.com defines extrinsic as “not essential or inherent.” Duhhhhhhh, that explains why I feel the way I do. Then I have to realize that my true motivation should come from Him, so by my actions I have told our Precious Savior He wasn’t motivating enough! Sorry God your just not worth doing a good job. I’m not motivated enough to put reading Your Word and praying at the top of my list! Wow talk about a “God” moment. I always know it’s from God because His word says He doesn’t come to condemn us but to encourage us with the truth! How beautiful and majestic is our God! He loves us so much that He continues to refine us and shape us into the beautiful creations He made So my challenge to you is: What motivates you? What masks do you wear to shape how people see you? If we continue to wear masks to hide who God has created, how can they see God in us? They can’t!
121 Days…
Posted by TimAynMar 30
Day 12: I had the most pleasant surprise on Day 9, the morning after God opened my eyes to being transparent. At about 10:30 in the morning the kids started yelling that somebody was at the door. Turns out two of my closest friends from Alabama had drove ALL night to surprise me! Talk about being blessed We had a wonderful time of fellowship, miniature golf and shopping of course. Words cannot explain the joy my heart felt when I saw their smiling faces…to know that my friends sacrificed A LOT to drive across the country just to see me! I’m still in shock, LOL. My friends left at about 4 this morning and after saying our goodbyes I went back to bed for some much needed rest. Again to my two sweet friends, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. I pray you know how much you blessed me with your visit!!!
Life is a balancing act, whether you stay home or not. As Moms it feels as if we’re being pulled in multiple directions and still expected to keep that balance. For me those directions become magnified when DH is gone. When just a few are giving me a hearty tug I can recognize it and gently pull things back in balance. However, when they all pull at once life for me becomes a tug-of-war that I can’t win. This is where I am finding myself right now. I feel like a divided person in every aspect of my life. My beliefs are not in question, but as my stress level increases and the pulling gets stronger I have to decide where my best efforts are needed. How do you decide that when all aspects seem to carry the same importance? I am an “imperfect perfectionist.” Maybe you are too I will never be perfect and most of the time it doesn’t stop me from moving on, but it does make me try 110% on everything my heart desires to do. You can probably imagine how this character trait magnifies my tug-of-war. Homeschool vs. Public school, time regimented homeschool lessons vs. fun learning environment, healthy menu planning and cooking vs. quick prepared store bought foods, more rewarding of good behavior vs. more discipline of the bad behavior, teaching responsibility with kid’s chores vs. me keeping the house clean and presentable, etc. I’m sure you can add a few more, but I think the point is clear. My balance point won’t look the same as yours, God calls us to find the balance for our individual families that brings Him glory. God revealed to me today, through my most amazing sister Arissa, that when life is pulling you in every direction your only hope is to crawl onto the Rock in the middle!! He is our Rock and our Salvation! You must focus your efforts on staying on the Rock, God will help you restore that balance. My mind is always searching for the why’s and how’s to every situation, so naturally I question what caused me to fall off the Rock in the first place. The answer is always my quiet and prayer time. As soon as I let life choke out my time with my Savior, I start to slide off my Rock. It’s so slow and gradual I don’t notice it until it’s too late! The wonderful thing about God is that He doesn’t care why you fell off, he just wants you to climb back on…are your feet firmly planted on your Rock today?
121 Days…
Posted by TimAynMar 26
Day 8: I believe when you hear God asking you to let your life be a testimony you have 3 choices; ignore the call, accept the call, but share only what’s comfortable, or accept the call and be transparent. God’s word says His blessings follow our obedience, so the right answer is to be transparent in our testimonies. Hey, if we expect our government to be transparent so we can trust them, maybe our life transparency will help people trust us, and eventually God. Just sayin’! Let me preface today’s post with the truth that I am no different than the next Mom at the park, no better or worse. God gives us each a different experience in life so that we can grow closer to Him and show others how much He loves us, even during the storms of life. If we aren’t transparent in our struggles then we can’t effectively minister to those around us. We may even rob people of their blessings because we refuse to ask for help when it’s needed. People are always comparing themselves with those around them, if you appear to be “perfect” they may not want to admit their struggles for fear of judgement. Much easier said than done, but here goes…
The truth of why I didn’t post for two days is because I was depressed and seriously couldn’t have heard God if He was using a megaphone! Ouch, transparency hurts The goal of this website from it’s conception has always been to point to the Lord with every topic. When I felt God calling me to post during this deployment, I knew the goal had not changed. We all have good days and bad, they are just magnified when you are experiencing them alone. The world doesn’t stop just because you miss your best friend! If you’ve put your faith in God then you have to believe that is part of His plan too. I’ve heard several pastors preach on the process of refining gold. First the gold must be heated to an extremely high temperature. *Insert life difficulty here* As the gold melts and loses it’s shape all the impurities rise to the surface. *Insert past baggage/hurts/issues* An experienced goldsmith must expertly wipe away the impurities completely without leaving any trace AND without wiping away any of the expensive, precious gold. *GOD IS THE ULTIMATE GOLDSMITH* If any of the impurities remain, the process must be repeated. This step is essential because the future strength of this gold depends on it’s purity! When this step is completed the expert goldsmith can then pour out the pure gold into it’s mold and shape it however He chooses. This is a beautiful example of how God works in our lives…when we first put our faith in God we become a beautiful piece of gold in God’s collection. As time goes on the impurities that are naturally found within us begin to weaken the shape. Sometimes it’s our past “impurities,” or it’s the wear and tear of daily use without “cleaning” that weakens the shape. Whatever it is, the ONLY way to strengthen the shape is to submit yourself to the “Goldsmith” and allow Him to remove the impurities!! It’s difficult to endure the high temperature of the refining process, but we must trust that He has a stronger and bigger purpose for us to fulfill. It’s not only a painful process, but a scary process. If we don’t understand “why” this is happening then we can’t possibly see the beautiful piece we are to become. Sharing how God has “refined” you is paramount in sharing your testimony. You must be transparent so that other’s can understand the process and allow God to work in their lives.
This separation in particular is a “refining” experience for me and one that I will continue to share with you transparently for His glory.
